The 5:2 Diet – Feast and Fast AKA Starve and Starve Less
So, I’m trying the 5:2 diet, which most of you will have heard of because it’s been through more people than Jodie Marsh.
For those small minority that haven’t heard of it (probably a smaller minority still, than the minority that HAVEN’T slept with Jodie Marsh), the premise of it is you starve yourself 2 days a week, and eat whatever you want 5 days a week.
I don’t know the science behind it, and I feel it at this point to advise I am NOT a nutritionist and this blog should not be classed as health advice. Although if you are stupid enough to take health advice from someone sitting in their dressing gown at 1pm on a weekday eating fruit rock then maybe you deserve to get ill?
The fast days are the days that are the ones that are meant to ‘kick start’ your metabolism or whatever, and you have to stick to 500 calories. 500 calories. Sweet baby Jesus a Banana is 100, how am I supposed to live on 500 calories?
Actually, there IS a lot you can eat on 500 calories a day. You can either have a spinach omelette, some vegetable soup or some chicken. OR you can have a plain omelette, some spinach chicken or some vegetable soup. OR you can have some chicken soup, a vegetable omelette or some spinach.
Sounds fun right? Well no, it’s not. Fast days are terrible. There really isn’t a lot you can eat for 500 calories. You are DEFINALTEY not having a treat on that day. The best idea I can give you is to drink loads of water and put a picture of someone skinny on your fridge and write ‘back off fat arse’ on it.
The GOOD news is, you can eat what you want on feast days. Yep, you really can. After 24 hours of vegetable and chicken omelettes, the scientists say you can eat what you want. You can bake all those treats you have been dreaming of on your fast day into a cake and inject it into your bloodstream if you want. As long as you stick to your fast day, it should be fine.
But that REALY can’t be true can it? I cant REALLY get away with starving for two days and then eating McDonalds and Pizza’s for the rest?
Well no, idiot. Obviously you can’t. No matter what the ‘science’ of it is, if you eat like Gemma Collins after breaking free from a concentration camp on your feast days of course you are not going to lose any weight. The premise of the diet is, because people are allowed to have the occasional treat, they are less inclined to treat on fast days.
There is also some science behind it that says that you actually, after a few fast days start to eat less on feast days, and I have to admit after going to bed yesterday and thinking ‘I AM GOING TO WAKE UP TOMMORROW AND EAT EVERYTHING IN THE CUPBOARD, A PANINI FROM COSTA AND MAYBE THE CAT’ I have actually had some toast and have not really been hungry after that.
I think faddy diets are going to be around us for a while. Every girl my age or in my generation has gone, Tamagotchi – Spice Girls – ‘Mizz’ Magazine – Girls Aloud CD – TOWIE Obsession – Michael Kors Watch – Fad Diet.
The trick is, to not be a complete melt about it. You KNOW if you do 5:2 and eat cheeseburgers every feast day and don’t exercise, it is not going to work.
If, like me you find diet and exercise about as interesting as hearing about your neighbours new porch, and you are going to do 5:2, STICK to fast days, don’t over indulge on too many feast days and try and get out for a walk a few times a week.
You can learn more about intermittent fasting with this book: