*I was invited to take part in The Crystal Maze for free as part of a team of bloggers who were providing coverage for https://thelivereview.co.uk.
*There are display advertising banners on this post but trust me, no one is getting rich from THEM.
Are you even a London lifestyle blogger if you haven’t been to the Crystal Maze?
As I desperately clung to the rocks on the climbing wall to stop myself from falling into a pit of spikes (foam ones, don’t worry), only one thought crossed my mind: “I AM LITERALLY FULFILLING A LIFELONG AMBITION.”
If you are someone of my generation you’ll remember the Crystal Maze well. Looking back on it now, I guess it looks kinda tacky. But let me tell you guys, in the 90’s, it looked…well still kinda tacky. But it was AWESOME. Like most people, when the Crystal Maze cancelled I just made peace with it. I don’t really remember it exiting my life, but I certainly remember it entering it again.
You see my friend Lindsey (you’ll remember her from my blog about Drake and Lifehouse Spa), has a particular knack for nostalgia. One day she’ll just randomly start singing “I get knocked down, but I get up again, you ain’t never gonna kick me down” (her favourite song), or ask you if you remember Mystic Meg. So one day, when we were about 14 and we were doing our mandatory avoidance of PE (because doing PE was sooooooo uncool), she invented The “Crystal Maze” game. The game basically consisted of her standing on a market stall and throwing torn up bits of paper to see who could collect the most. In a way, it was kind of like we were doing PE anyway which made me feel better about bunking. That may sound crude but I went to school in Pitsea you see huns.
The Crystal Maze London has been on my radar for a while, but I’ve never got around to going. We keep saying we’ll go but I’d heard rumours it was expensive (it really isn’t) and never looked into it. So when Tanya, from GlamGlitzGloss my favourite blogger friend (*only blogger friend) invited me as someone had dropped out of her team I was delighted.
Off I went the Shafetsbury Avenue with all of my years of practice of Pitsea Crystal Maze under my belt and some brand new Puma sportswear purchased for the occasion. Annoyingly there were issues with the trains so I was slightly late but the team were and whisked me straight in to put my stuff in a locker (lockers are provided free) and meet my team. Abigail and I were already following each other so I knew of her and of course I read her blog and Hannah was new to me but I’ve since spent a couple of hours balls deep in her blog, Behind the False Lashes and it’s really good. Both of the girls were lovely and highly hilarious which reminded me another one of the reasons I love the blogger life. It honestly baffles me how people hate meeting new people because I love it, it is my favourite thing in this whole wide world.
One of the things that made our experience so cool was that our maze master was so fun. Each individual team get a maze master to take them around, just like in the TV show. The maze is split up into all of the zones that you see on the TV show too, like Aztec, futuristic etc. Then the games are split into physical, skill, mystery and mental. I asked my team to do me one favour and just put me on the physical ones. It’s a long-running joke that I can’t count (I can, just not quickly, I panic), so it was for the best. I failed two, but won two crystals so I think that is pretty decent. I don’t really want to give away too much about the games because I really would encourage everyone reading this to go. But they were awesome. They are more or less the exact type of games you know and love from watching Crystal Maze.
I’m telling you, people who think holding their newborn child is the greatest moment of their lives have obviously never had a crystal release into their hands after an epic game of skilfully balancing sand with bamboo sticks.
After you have finished all of the games, you get to go to the Crystal Dome, which was obviously the highlight for me. They also play the Crystal Maze theme tune while you are running everywhere which adds to the excitement.
Unfortunately Lindsey’s version of Pitsea Crystal Maze didn’t prepare me very well for the Crystal Dome. I thought you could collect all of the tickets and then put them in the box at the end. You can’t. So none of mine counted. But oh well, I purchased myself a Crystal from the gift shop anyway so who’s the real winner here?
The Crystal Maze is a fantastic experience and I would encourage anyone to go. Even if you haven’t had practice collecting torn up bits of paper from the floor of a market stall.
You can book tickets to The Crystal Maze here.