Aldi to brand name chocolate conversion
Aldi, has managed to undergo a massive culture shift. In around 10 years, it has gone from a shop you wouldn’t be seen dead in to a cultural beacon for the savvy shoppers. Going from strength to strength, the brand has been helped by numerous taste tests, including one where the £3.79 Toro Loco Tempranillo beat a number of mid market wines by a mile.
The truth is, the circle of life keeps going round. The more we are in an economic crisis and are demanding cheaper food, the more Aldi are going to make and plough back into their company, making their produce better.
My favourite bit of Aldi by far, is the random shit aisle, where you can pick up a pair of mittens and potted plant and some cables ties, all just while you are doing your weekly shop.
My second favourite, is the chocolate. However, it’s a complicated game. If you mistake a Romeo for a Titan it’s all over and you could end up with some unsolicited coconut sliding down your esophagus in the middle of Strictly.
My Mum sat and explained them all to me on Saturday night, so I thought I would share the info for you.
Titan = Mars bar
So the unnecessarily aggressively named TITAN (you definitely have to shout it), is basically a Mars bar. Titan is actually one of Saturn’s moons, so I can kind of see the correlation there. I don’t know why they didn’t name them after Mar’s actual moons, I think Phobos and Demios are fabulous names for chocolate bars.
Maybe there was a copy wright issue?
Romeo = Bounty
If you like Bounty’s, I think you are an absolute sicko. Coconut in chocolate is about unatural as having custard on your roast. Either or, I have included them because one of my top funners I work with loves a Bounty.
We all know the name Bounty is meant to be a bit piratey, sort of from the desert island theme etc etc, which makes sense. I don’t quite understand where the ‘Romeo’ concept comes from. Maybe Shakespeare included a hidden passage everyone but Aldi are unaware of apart from Aldi and Romeo REALLY liked Juliet’s coconuts.
Seal bar = Penguin Bar
If you need this one explaining, you do need a bit of a slap and a reality check. Not only is the packaging so similar and blindingly obvious, Aldi, those cheeky risk takers have made the packaging near on the same.
I reckon they made all of their others a bit different to save a hefty lawsuit, got to the seal bar and just couldn’t be arsed and went and overdosed on TITAN’S.
Racer = Snickers
So the laddishly named Racer is a take on one of our favourite allergic reaction causes, the Snickers. Aldi, if you think naming your chocolate a ‘Racer’ will keep me, the average twenty something woman away, you are sorely mistaken.
Depending on how bad a day I have had, you could name your chocolate ‘melted and reset doog mess’ and I would probably still give it a good go. Don’s mix up your Racer with your TITAN either, there’s nothing worse than biting into what you think it nutless and is actually very nutty and takes 32 chews.
Seriously guys, if you can’t figure this one out, you need to sort your life out.
I can’t do everything, you want me to eat it for you?